The single hardest thing about being a mom for me right now is watching how fast Sebastian grows up every day. It’s not sleep training, breastfeeding, no time to myself or a lack of sleep. Those don’t exist anymore. It’s seeing him do something for the first time and being so excited but sad at the same time. Because you know you won’t have that experience with him again.
It’s always interesting looking back at old pictures and blog posts to see what was going on. In this post, I was just a few weeks out from my due date and I hadn’t yet felt that pure connection with Sebastian yet. And now, every day I wake up smiling because I get to see his beautiful little face. Every day, every memory I cherish so deeply because I know I’ll never have this moment again.
It really hit me in Cartagena. We were swimming on our last day in the Walled City. He was giggling, smiling…showing off his six little teeth and splashing around the water. It was just me and Sebastian enjoying some pool time to ourselves, while Daddy was out walking around the city. We had so much fun, but in the back of my mind, I knew we’d never get this moment again together. It just seemed so perfect. The next time we go to Cartagena, he’ll be playing in the big pool, probably without mommy. So sad.
I don’t mean to make it sound gloomy cause it’s not at all. It’s amazing. I think, being a Mom is such an incredible responsibility and the feeling of being Sebastian’s is just more than I could ever have dreamed of. Every night before he goes to bed, I give him the biggest hug and let him know how much I love spending time with him. You quickly realize and appreciate everything your parents did and continue to do for you. They love you unconditionally and now I am in their shoes and feel the same way about Sebastian. Every day brings something new and while it’s sad to watch him grow-up, it’s even more exciting to experience what’s next with him.
Thanks for reading!