Leaving home was one of the hardest things I’ve done. After all, it was all I knew. I went to University of Missouri, which was less than two hours from Kansas City and that’s where I met Matt. After he graduated, he moved to San Francisco to start work and I still had a couple years left. I went back and forth on moving out there even though it was always my dream to move to a big city and be a part of all the hustle and bustle. Looking back on it, I have no idea why I was in such a big hurry to move away from home. My parents are my best friends and I had an amazing group of friends. I just needed to experience something else and the day after I graduated from college, I packed up my little car and drove out west.
Hello San Francisco!
The first few years, Matt and I lived together. It was tough. I cried all the time because I missed my family. This made it incredibly difficult on our relationship, in fact, Matt and I went our separate ways a little after a year of living together. As you can imagine, a little too much, too fast. We were long distance for years and then all of a sudden we lived together. It was not the best way to transition.
During my second year, I finally started to assimilate myself to California and began working at a fun company, where I met two of my best girlfriends. Since I had zero friends in California, they were a great way to network and met other people…and they did just that! As time passed, Matt and I eventually found our way back to each other and moved into the same building. Do you remember the San Francisco apartment I shared on Instagram Stories? After a few years of really figuring things out, him and I eventually moved in together. This is around the same time I started my blog.
Time for change
Things were going great at work and I finally had a network full of friends, entrepreneurs and mentors. Although things were moving in the going great in San Francisco, I knew I wanted to move to New York. At the time, there were lots of movement going on at work, so I talked to a few people, figuring out how I could get promoted to move to the New York office. After a year, it happened. Matt and I moved to New York City. Both of our jobs transferred us to our respective offices in the city. Conveniently enough, they were each only a few blocks from our apartment.
Things were good. We got engaged, married, brought home a couple of animals and then had baby Sebastian! This is when the “homesick” all came back. I felt like I was missing so much from being in New York, while my family was in Kansas City. Most days I was upset, I’d pull myself together, but every once-in-a-while, a good cry session and a call to my mom was needed.
This past Sunday, while I was back in KC picking up Sebastian and Batman, my mom showered me with delicious Mexican food and my dad helped me get all my things ready for the flight. It was really hard to leave them and head back to NYC. I can’t wait to see them again in August! We landed back in NYC and jumped in our cab to head home and see Matt and Kitty.
Sebastian’s Summer Style
The hardest part about moving away was missing out on seeing my beautiful niece grow-up. I missed my parents dearly too but my niece and I always have so much fun together. As tough as it is to be away, I’m thankful for the independence I’ve found by paving my own path. Here are a few tips if you’re thinking about leaving home or if you’re like me, far away from home!
Cry it out
If you have a bad day, just grab a bottle of wine and get out the tears. Go to bed early and wake up and start fresh. Things will get better! One day at a time.
Network hard and fast!
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve gone up to women colleagues and asked them if they want to hang out. It works. We eventually end up being friends and having a support system.
Make time to get back home
I use to go back home to see my family every couple of months. It was tough at first because it was expensive to travel and I was just starting out. Money wasn’t exactly raining from the trees. When I had a few extra bucks, I’d buy plane tickets to fly home. It got easier and easier every single time. Plus, my mom would come out to visit me every so often.
Even though the days were sometimes difficult, I had a lot of time to put together my goals and work on my dreams. Make a list and check it twice. Take the time and do something spectacular! Follow your dreams. The time away from my family gave me more clarity to what I wanted to do in life.
Don’t be scared to move away or move back home
Nothing is permeant. I say this to people all the time. If you move somewhere and it’s not for you, pack up your stuff and move back home. Always remember, if there is one thing that’s consistent, it’s change. Your company may move to another location and cause you to either find a new job or move back home. Embrace those changes! Really cool things happen when you follow the opportunities being presented to you!
Would love to hear from anyone else who moved away from home.